How to Boost Your Self-Esteem During a Layoff
- Chris Scherting
- 13 minutes ago
- 9 min read
I have been through three layoffs throughout my career. It’s a punch in the stomach when you are blindsided and forced into an urgent job search. One minute you are prepping for an update meeting with your boss, the next thing you know, you have been locked out of your email and computer, and you are (hopefully) reviewing a severance document.
No farewell happy hour. No project transitions. No closure. You scramble to figure out Cobra and apply for unemployment.
As you start to update your resume, your self-esteem spirals down, wondering, “Why me?” Yesterday, you had all the confidence in the world, kicking butt in your job. So, how do you get it back?
A job search after a layoff can be much more difficult than a job search while you are employed full-time because the situation was forced on you. Scrolling through LinkedIn, seeing all the green “open to work” banners from your connections who are also going through a difficult job search process can absolutely mess with your head.
Even if you’re amazing (and you are), job searching can crank up negative thoughts, mess with your confidence level, and make you question your value.
Hopefully, my ideas will help. But you will have to dig deep and power through. If you're feeling the weight of low self-esteem or feelings of inadequacy, it’s time for a reset. Let’s protect your mental health and help you stay hopeful during the process of job hunting.
Tips to boost your self-esteem after a lay-off
Here are the things I did when I was laid off to keep a positive attitude and support my confidence. I hope they work for you, too!
1. Be Grateful for the Time.
This is a weird spin on being forcibly unemployed. You have all day, every day, to look for a job. Your current job is looking for a new job!
You don’t have to do it covertly with fake doctor’s appointments. Or try to squeeze it in after work and after dinner, when you are exhausted. You can put your green “Open to Work” banner on LinkedIn and tell everyone you know you are looking for a new job.
Try to be grateful for the luxury of time. You can accelerate the process. You can schedule 2-3 networking meetings each day and spend a few hours looking at the various job boards.
Gratitude can shift your focus from “not enough” to “enough.” It can reinforce your self-worth. When you notice good things in your life, you start to internalize the idea that you deserve good things and that you’re worthy.
2. Reconnect with Your Past Co-workers.
Reach out to your favorite people from previous jobs. Ask them for help. Meet them for lunch, coffee, or even a video call. They will help remind you about how awesome you were and still are! You can reminisce about past projects when you kicked butt or crushed your goals. You can talk about your resilience through tough times or your creative problem-solving.
I am a big proponent of networking, and I always start with my “friendlies.” They have your back and will want to help immediately. Let them lift you up!
3. Create a "Brag Book"
Yes, it sounds cheesy. No, you shouldn’t skip it. Spend some time writing down the stories of your best projects and accomplishments from each job. Simmer on it. Remember how hard they were and feel proud of your good work.
Literally, write these stories! Open a Google Doc and start typing.
Some people find it tough to brag about themselves. I get it. But the job search is the perfect time to lead with a bit of ego and boast about your success and skills.
Did you happen to save copies of emails when people gave you praise or thanked you? Did your company have a program where you earned “kudos cards” or “on the spot” recognition? Bring those out and remind yourself about your awesome work.
This is a key part of building self-esteem during your search. These stories will also be used during interviews and help you with updating your resume.
4. Set Small, Specific Goals.
Focus on manageable tasks. Make your “to-do” list each day and feel the satisfaction of checking things off your list as you complete each item. There is something about the feeling you get when you scratch through a completed task. You’re getting stuff done and being productive.
Today, I’ll focus on my resume and play with ChatGPT to help with the writing.
First, I will review my brag book!
Those stories will also serve as interview prep and give me ideas for ChatGPT prompts to write my resume bullet points.
Once my resume is complete, I will update my LinkedIn profile.
Tomorrow, I will reach out to three people to ask for networking meetings.
Friday, I'll research interview questions and write down my best answers so I have a cheat sheet for when I get my first interviews scheduled.
A great way to stay motivated is to celebrate every small win and feel the accomplishment when you check off your list.
5. Use Positive Self-Talk (Even If It Feels Weird.)
If your internal dialogue sounds like a mean internet troll, time to change it. Stop beating yourself up just because the search is taking longer than you had hoped. You are still a rockstar; you have to find a way to believe it!
Louise Hay Power Thought Cards are a great tool! I have given them as gifts many times. They are beautifully designed and help you with new language to use with yourself,
Replace negative self-talk with positive self-talk:
I have unique strengths.
Any company would be lucky to have me.
This is just one step toward my next opportunity.
I am so grateful for this cool new job.
Your brain listens to what you tell it. Remember Viola Davis in “The Help?” "You is smart, you is kind, you is important.”
6. Use Affirmations in Your Passwords.
Start changing the passwords you manually have to type to include a phrase with an affirmation. Every time you type the password, you are giving yourself that positive energy and support to boost your confidence.
NewJob2026$
Ima*RockStar!2025
H!red$100K
7. Limit Your Search Time.
Staring at job boards, hitting Easy Apply, all day, every day won’t magically create a new job. And it will fuel your frustration and drain your energy and confidence.
Instead, focus for a few hours, take a break, then come back and focus again.
Check your emails and LinkedIn messages with coffee.
Make today’s “to-do” list so you can check things off!
Start scrolling through your saved job alerts. Save the jobs you want to research and explore later.
Once you’ve had your coffee, start submitting job applications for jobs that you are super excited about. Take the time to tailor your resume and cover letter.
Track your applications and save the link to the job post so you can refer to it later.
Send out a few networking meeting requests and follow up on the past requests.
Break for lunch. Take a walk, go to the gym. Hit the zoo or a museum for an hour.
Then come back to the job search and finish up your “to-do” list.
Double-check your unemployment requests.
Log off at the end of the day and take a mental break.
Try to set a time each day where you stop. Just like a regular work day. Take the time to cook yourself a nice dinner. Go to the library and check out books on resilience and motivation. Hang out with the friends and family members who feed your soul. Or, turn off your brain and binge the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City!
I know it’s scary to be laid off, and you feel like you should be looking for a job 10-12 hours a day, but I just don’t think it’s healthy. Try to find some balance. And try to take some time for yourself.
8. Change Your Location.
It’s easy to isolate and hunker down at home during a layoff. You’re worried about finances and don’t want to spend extra money, so you just stay home.
Something that might help boost your attitude is a simple change of location. The first place I recommend is your local library. I don’t know why, but I get such a great feeling every time I walk in. They have lots of comfy chairs or work stations and free wifi. Get out in the land of the living at least once a week!
Panera is another great option. During my last layoff, I joined their Unlimited Sip Club. It includes unlimited brewed coffee, tea, and fountain drinks. Then I tried to schedule all of my networking meetings at Panera.
Somehow, the actions of getting up, showering, getting dressed, and leaving the house can really help your outlook, make you feel inspired, and remind yourself that you are awesome!
9. Practice Your Interview Answers.
I have a very detailed post with 25 tips to prepare for an interview. A great way to boost your confidence for interviews is to be super-prepared. I highly recommend you read the other post, but here are a few tips you can do today to prepare for all future interviews:
Craft your “Tell Me About Yourself” story. Write it down. Practice it in your informational interview to see how it resonates. Record yourself to hear your “Um, LIke, You Knows!”
Write down your 10 least favorite interview questions. Now sit and think and create your best response for each one. Write them down, print them out, and practice!
Prepare a succinct and respectful response to the question about the layoff. “After the acquisition, several roles, including mine, were consolidated. It was a straightforward business decision, and I left on good terms. It gave me the space to think about my next step, and that’s actually why I’m excited about this role. It aligns much more closely with the kind of impact I want to have…”
Plan for questions about experience you may lack. My previous roles didn’t have a large emphasis on [X] but it’s one of the reasons why I am interested in this role. I’m currently X% of the way through a series on LinkedIn Learning. I’m even more excited now to apply what I’ve learned!
List out your questions to ask the interviewer. This relates to what you are looking for in your next job. Think about questions about the culture, strategic planning, team-building, success metrics, etc.
Doing this kind of “homework” will help you be prepared anytime you get a surprise interview request. All of this information is foundational to any job interview. Being more prepared should reduce some of the stress, lighten your mental load, and boost your confidence.
10. Celebrate Every Interview (Yes, Even the Awkward Ones)
Got an interview for a role you weren’t sure about? Great!
Had a weird Zoom call with a team asking about your spirit animal? Still a win!
Invited to do a virtual interview with a computer and not a human? It’s still progress!
Each job interview and networking meeting is still a good chance to practice, gather constructive criticism, and prep for the next time.
11. Find a Friend Who Gets It.
Job hunting isn’t a solo sport. Find someone in your support network you can lean on during this crazy process.
I wouldn’t wish a layoff on my worst enemy. But, as luck would have it, during my last layoff, a close family friend was going through the same thing. She and I texted or talked every day. We shared advice and cheered each other on.
Positive relationships help keep your positive outlook strong when the rejections roll in.
12. Accept That It's a Weird System.
The job search and interview process is often random and chaotic.
Sometimes companies lose the budget for the role. Sometimes a better fit shows up internally. Many times they ghost. I call these “surrender moments.” You have no control here. Don’t take it personally.
It’s not you, it’s them. It’s just... a broken system at work. Hang in there! You are still awesome!
13. Strike the Super Hero Pose.
I saw this on Grey’s Anatomy when Dr. Amelia Shepherd was going into a crazy difficult surgery. She struck the super hero pose to build her confidence. I challenge you to watch this and not get the chills!
Do this at home before a video interview. Strike the pose each morning while your coffee brews! Why not? What do you have to lose?
I also wore my Wonder Woman socks for interviews! Any tips to boost your confidence and make you smile!
Check out this related post with more weird tips! 7 Unconventional Tips for Remote Interviews.
14. Visualize Success.
Before interviews or sending a job application, spend a couple of minutes visualizing the specific outcomes you want. Put that positive energy out there! Elite athletes use this to visualize the win, the goal, or the stuck landing. You can do the same thing!
See yourself answering confidently. See yourself getting the job offer call. Remind yourself that all your experience will help you be successful in your next job. Envision yourself kicking butt in your new job! You’re training your brain for success!
This might sound a little “woo woo,” but, again, what do you have to lose? Lots of people believe in the power of manifesting. Set your intentions and try it out!
You’re more than a resume. You can’t be summarized in bullet points.
With the right job search approach, positive self-talk, and support network, you can keep moving toward better career opportunities. And toward the dream job that actually fits who you are.
You’ve got this! Good luck!
Additional Resources
